Backstabbers

Hi,

I have noticed a trend among abusive bosses, specifically my abusive bosses of the past. Most of them have been women. These managers first try to become very chummy with me by disclosing their most intimate details about their personal lives such as what method of birth control they are using. I've never, ever needed to know that information! Really, I don't need to know. Some of my real friends keep intimate details such as contraception to themselves. Those kind of conversations make me uncomfortable. Also I don't reciprocate with the same kind of information. After these managers act like I'm their new BFF, they find some way to abuse their authority over me. What's up with that behavior?


I'm friendly, but not that friendly, with my bosses. I follow directions and all that. I'm a good employee and know what I am doing. Mostly I try to be polite and professional.

My psychologist and one human resource director told me to tell these bitches (they didn't say bitches) that I don't want to continue having these conversations and that I am uncomfortable. Hopefully, my future bosses won't be backstabbers.

These types of managers are crazy and can make you feel like you're crazy. We're not crazy.
I've had episodes of paralyzing depression and anxiety and no self-esteem thanks to these idiots. And when I mean episodes I mean months and years of this shirt.

I am very curious about the whys of their behavior and I can undermine them.

Truthfully, I'd like to destroy THEIR careers, but I'm not that type of person. I let karma take care of those types of people.

Also, I want to be a person they are scared to reckon with, but I don't know how to do that.

Do you know of any tips of how to deal with abusive bosses.
I know you have crazy boss stories out there. Why not share them?

Lita

Here's the definition from dictionary.com.

backstabber

- 2 dictionary results

/ˈbækˌstæb/ Show Spelled–verb (used with object), -stabbed, -stab·bing.

to attempt to discredit (a person) by underhanded means, as innuendo, accusation, or the like.

Angry - Damn the Economy

Last night I became angrier and angrier because the longer I am without a full-time job, I have less and less money. The less money I have the less I can do. But what I am really angry about is that my far-away little ones are growing up, and I haven't been able to fly and visit them. I am angry I am missing their growing-up years.

Also, I am angry I cannot afford to buy a better home computer and the printer/scanner/copier to go with it. I am angry that I cannot afford to move to a better place.

I am angry I can't go on vacation.

Now, what do I do with anger?

Ideally, I take my anger and turn it into energy and start a company that takes off and makes me rich. Yep, I got money on my mind today. In my fantasy, I have the knowledge to do this and the hope that it all works out. At least I can take this anger and apply it to my job search.

You know, I hate my life right now, but I don't hate myself. I see myself as lacking some skills though. There's a fine difference. I am angry because other people have the good life and I do not. Therefore, what can I do to get a good life, to improve my situation?

I already went to college and do have various types of work experiences. Damn the economy!!!

Maybe I shouldn't say that. I think the economy has already been damned. Grow the economy!!!! Let the economy live and flourish!? How's that for positive thinking!

Job Interview Resistance

I had a job interview Thursday morning and did NOT want to go. I thought about calling it off and was looking for ways to rationalize why I canceled the interview just in case anyone asked. Getting out of bed, completing the application, and getting ready was like running in water against a strong gush of wind.

I am so glad I went to the job interview. I felt very comfortable with the hiring manager and very comfortable talking about my experiences. When the interview was over, I was very surprised an entire hour had passed.
This past afternoon I have a great sense of accomplishment and relief. As a plus, the sun came out.

Right now, I am not concerned about getting the job. I am just happy I pushed myself and had a good interview. Sometimes events are better than expected.

And no, I don't look like anyone in the photo. 

Daily Anxiety - Cut the Commute

One way I am trying to cut down on future daily anxiety is to have a short commute. I'm looking for a job that is within a reasonable driving distance from my home. Yes, jobs are hard to find, and the unemployed shouldn't be choosy; but I keep looking.

Broken Objects and the Value of a Walk

My printer/copier/scanner broke, and I still haven't bought a new one. My car broke down, and I can't afford to pay for repairs right now. Both broken things have caused inconveniences and strain on my budget. Yet, I maintained an okay mood. In years past, I would think my whole LIFE was breaking down, and God found me unworthy. I still think I am worthy of living and realize the car and the printer were not personally attacking me, neither was God or the universe attacking me. In this way I have grown and healed.

 I went to a party with my friends who gave me a ride. And even though I am without car, printer, ipod, ipad, ithingamajiggy, camera, and a few other techno goodies, my friends still LIKE me.

However, my part-time job caused me great anxiety, and so did my parent. Both the management of the job and the parent lack planning. The job kept making demands that I couldn't meet because management did not provide me with tools. I keep knocking on management's doors, and they are starting to respond. The parent acts upon feelings and not intellect. Finally, parent listened to reason once he settled down.

So, I had some sleepless nights and chest pains. Hello, Xanax! A wise person hearing my complaints reminded me to take care of myself in whatever form I need too. DUH! So I made time to talk, to act, and to go for a walk. I enjoyed my walk in the cold, and turned that anxiety into energy to propel myself around the neighborhood. Also, I made myself some good hearty oatmeal with protein power sprinkled in plus brown sugar.

It's way too easy to get caught up with the stresses of life to neglect ourselves. The reality is that every day I require self-care.

In other news, I sewed three tote bags without a pattern and used up some fabric. The bags look experimental because they are. I learned some sewing techniques by trial and error. Sewing was rather addicting to me and distracted me from my lack of funds.

Action is the prescription of the day.